Chapter Text
They didn't deserve you, you know? Not a single soul - not even him. He loved you, more then words and actions can describe. But, somehow, everytime he opened his mouth to apologize or blame it on an excuse, you could never see the so-called "love" he had for you.
Not when you've been beaten unconscious, or bleeding all over the floor, or even when you have a very noticeable stab wound that's a size of a small pocket knife in your shoulder that still has trouble healing to this day. He claims that he loves you, every single time. Yet, he treats you like nothing but a rag doll and sex toy to however he pleases.
And unfortunately, you were beginning to grow accustomed to it. Like it's just another day to you. But, no matter how you felt about the situation, no matter how scarred or terrified you are, you could never leave. You loved him. More than yourself as it seems. You just couldn't leave a broken man behind without feeling the immense guilt.
You know he didn't mean to hurt you, you knew that he loved you even despite not feeling it. But, you had done this to him; you're the reason why he's broken.
•••
"How's the wound?"
"It's fine..." You spoken in a soft manner, not wanting to trigger another episode. With him, you always have to be on your guard.
You shrugged your shoulder lightly, trying to relieve the new but known distress of the reopened stabbed wound that was poorly stitched by your own hands.
You felt as if you could cry, but you knew that it was too impossible. Your eyes were dried of all the tears you had shed every single night in the past years. But, the burning ache in your shoulder brought memories and even more pain through you with chills and shudders. It scared you that the pain was becoming more and more numb with each beating.
"..."
".... I'm sorry." The feeling of his callused but strangely comforting warm hands palming up and down your arms caused you to tense, and the fact that your body had invited the warmth he gave off made you hate yourself even more. "I-its fine.."
Staying as still as you possibly could as he kissed the nape of your neck, you felt as his arms moved to wrap around your waist, forcing a whimper from you at the pain that shocked through you from the pressure of your ribs being pulled against. "Shhh." Kissing the back of your shoulder this time, he took it slow on to moving you on his lap, making sure to not cause anymore pain than he already has. But, you both knew that this little act isn't going to last very long... it never does.
"I'm sorry."
"It's-... it's fine, Maliki. Really... it is."
"I-... I love you."
"..."
"I love you, too, Mal.." Even if your tongue burned with revulsion, your heart throbbed with longing desire. You wanted to kiss him; to share the lost love you once had; to rekindle the lust of wanting to be in the others presence once again. But, you knew that was long gone - atleast for you, that is.
But with him.. all he wanted to do was be in your presence, to touch you, to kiss you, and unfortunately... beat you. You wanted to hate him, it was just hard when you loved him.
The pleasure and pain swirling inside you always fighting, always alit in raging storms of flames and embers. Never once calming, nor dwindling.
"Cross my heart," His breath fanned against the side of your neck, awaiting your response,
"... Hope to die."
"Stick a needle..."
"... In my eye," A tear slide down your cheek, but the feeling of his smile against the cool of your neck calmed you while his arms tightened softly. "Good boy." He praised you. He was always happy when you said the rhyme with him. Relighting the very much loved memories of childhood you two had shared.
"Good, good boy.. My good boy... Mine." He whispered breathlessly as he nuzzles happily against your neck, sharing a few pecks.
"Only yours." Slowly, you turned your head to place a soft kiss on top of his still moving head. And for that little act of affection grew the tightness around your bruised waist, "... Say it.. Say it again."
"... Only yours."
"Yes... Yes, Mine.. Only mine."